Love a loner or just leave him alone
I am alone. And not just alone, but also really lonely. You ask me how I'm so sure of this? Okay, let me narrate to you my experience this evening.
If I were a regular person a.k.a your average Joe, I'd be fuming right now, due to the ill treatment I received from someone I kinda like. I know I am lonely, because I'm quick to give anyone I have the hots for, a chance to hurt me. Out of the blues, he called me and suggested that we meet up in the area. This was really exciting, you know, having not seen him in weeks. You need to see how my mood was lifted in an instant, just at the prospect of getting to see him again.
I arrive at UNILAG, all anticipatory, a little surprised that he was not there yet, considering that he'd called to say he was close about 20 minutes ago. Anyway, I went in and hung around for a few minutes before calling him. There was no answer, so I guessed he was in a noisy place. I walked around and after a few more minutes, settled at the UBA park, just by the school main gate. Here, I was greeted by seats of couples. Most of the seats had been taken by a guy and a girl and I felt kind of awkward settling in alone.
As soon as I sat, I called him again. This time, three consecutive times. There was still no answer. At this point, my mind suggested to me that I had been stood up. It was really painful to consider the thought, but all evidences seemed to say this was the case. I tried to refute the suggestion, citing the fact that he would not do this, since he had gone out of his way to call me for the hangout. I decided to wait for five more minutes before leaving. Still nothing. L stood me up.
No explanation can be good enough. Except of course, he was in an accident, or was mugged by robbers. Otherwise, I really never want to hear from him again. I would say I hate him, because of how betrayed I feel from his actions. But I know I can't. Hate has no fertile ground in this heart, made of soft chocolate. Only beautiful roses are allowed to grow here, taking their much needed sunlight from the continuous stream of positive thoughts I allow to take hold in my mind.
Come tomorrow, when I see his picture in my chat list again, I will feel like chatting him up. Even though I'm not happy at all that he wasted my time and broke my heart this night, a mere sincere apology from him would reverse the hands of time and wipe away all of his transgressions.
Life. Can I please make a request? All that I want is someone to love me unconditionally. Unconditionally, the way I tend to love those that have that this kind of effect that L has on me. The kind, that B had on me, back in those days, when I could think of nothing more than to hold him close. The clock of my time here is fast ticking away. I want to feel the joy, of knowing that the one who is wrapped around my mind would rather not have it any other way, because he also feels the same way. Life, I pray. Make me happy, please. I am so, so lonely :'( and I definitely know that this is not karma. I deserve better.
If I were a regular person a.k.a your average Joe, I'd be fuming right now, due to the ill treatment I received from someone I kinda like. I know I am lonely, because I'm quick to give anyone I have the hots for, a chance to hurt me. Out of the blues, he called me and suggested that we meet up in the area. This was really exciting, you know, having not seen him in weeks. You need to see how my mood was lifted in an instant, just at the prospect of getting to see him again.
I arrive at UNILAG, all anticipatory, a little surprised that he was not there yet, considering that he'd called to say he was close about 20 minutes ago. Anyway, I went in and hung around for a few minutes before calling him. There was no answer, so I guessed he was in a noisy place. I walked around and after a few more minutes, settled at the UBA park, just by the school main gate. Here, I was greeted by seats of couples. Most of the seats had been taken by a guy and a girl and I felt kind of awkward settling in alone.
As soon as I sat, I called him again. This time, three consecutive times. There was still no answer. At this point, my mind suggested to me that I had been stood up. It was really painful to consider the thought, but all evidences seemed to say this was the case. I tried to refute the suggestion, citing the fact that he would not do this, since he had gone out of his way to call me for the hangout. I decided to wait for five more minutes before leaving. Still nothing. L stood me up.
No explanation can be good enough. Except of course, he was in an accident, or was mugged by robbers. Otherwise, I really never want to hear from him again. I would say I hate him, because of how betrayed I feel from his actions. But I know I can't. Hate has no fertile ground in this heart, made of soft chocolate. Only beautiful roses are allowed to grow here, taking their much needed sunlight from the continuous stream of positive thoughts I allow to take hold in my mind.
Come tomorrow, when I see his picture in my chat list again, I will feel like chatting him up. Even though I'm not happy at all that he wasted my time and broke my heart this night, a mere sincere apology from him would reverse the hands of time and wipe away all of his transgressions.
Life. Can I please make a request? All that I want is someone to love me unconditionally. Unconditionally, the way I tend to love those that have that this kind of effect that L has on me. The kind, that B had on me, back in those days, when I could think of nothing more than to hold him close. The clock of my time here is fast ticking away. I want to feel the joy, of knowing that the one who is wrapped around my mind would rather not have it any other way, because he also feels the same way. Life, I pray. Make me happy, please. I am so, so lonely :'( and I definitely know that this is not karma. I deserve better.
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