LONELY BLACK BOY

Not once, and not twice this weekend, have I thought about jumping back on Grindr after not having used the app for about two months. The reason that I decided to walk away from those unproductive chatting grounds in the first place is multiple-fold. Firstly, the pandemic lockdown season kicked in in March 2020 and that meant that if I didn't want to be one of those unfortunate statistics, I needed to keep my dick in my hands: pun intended. My stewpidness actually had a hook-up right after the government announced the lockdown and I spent a few weeks being anxious that I might have contracted the COVID-19 from my casual sex partner. Even though we used a condom, I spend a lot of time kissing his face. What a darling he was that the first thing he opted to do when he got into my apartment was washing his hands. On another note, it started to dawn on me that my primary need for being on Grindr was not being met. I am still fairly new in this country after having only ever lived ...

I was blocked on Grindr And because I'm made of flesh and blood, I feel rejected. I feel that subtle throb of pain, lurking in the background of my heart. Once again, my fragile heart is trying to recover from a kick; a kick back from fantasia into reality. But I've done this more times than I can count on my fingers. Hence, I can carry on pretty well with the rest of my day's activities while this healing process in underway. I don't know why getting blocked by this person even matters at all to me. He sent me a pic and from the look of things, he probably won't have been my type anyways. He's the daddy type. Old but muscular and stocky. He sent me a selfie which showed he had a six-pack. In response, I sent him two of my best. Two seconds after, the Grindr thread disappeared right before my very eyes. He gave me no chance whatsoever to explain myself for looking so... (whatever way I looked that is apparently the opposite of what he's looking out...

Yesterday, a younger guy (22 years old) direct messaged me on Grindr. I'm currently 26 (a few months short of being 27). I opened the message and customarily went on to check out the lad's profile. He had a decent but not outstanding face pic on the profile. I read the profile write up and there was nothing remarkable to find there. I ignored his message. Then it occurred to me how of recent, this has been my general feeling about (and reaction to) younger guys who reach out me on Grindr. I just feel like there'd be very little substance and chemistry between me and someone who has little 'real-life' experience. And since I'm not the type who can ignore everything just to get some booty, I generally pass on such advances. I can vividly remember (what was probably) the first time I was rejected on Grindr. It was in November of 2014, in my first week ever of using Grindr. The guy in question was a guy who was in his 30's at the time. During the chat on...